Act 5, Scene 1: Padua. Before LUCENTIO'S house

SCENE I. Padua. Before LUCENTIO'S house.

    GREMIO discovered. Enter behind BIONDELLO, LUCENTIO, and BIANCA

BIONDELLO

    Softly and swiftly, sir; for the priest is ready.

LUCENTIO

    I fly, Biondello: but they may chance to need thee
    at home; therefore leave us.

BIONDELLO

    Nay, faith, I'll see the church o' your back; and
    then come back to my master's as soon as I can.

    Exeunt LUCENTIO, BIANCA, and BIONDELLO

GREMIO

    I marvel Cambio comes not all this while.

    Enter PETRUCHIO, KATHARINA, VINCENTIO, GRUMIO, with Attendants

PETRUCHIO

    Sir, here's the door, this is Lucentio's house:
    My father's bears more toward the market-place;
    Thither must I, and here I leave you, sir.

VINCENTIO

    You shall not choose but drink before you go:
    I think I shall command your welcome here,
    And, by all likelihood, some cheer is toward.

    Knocks

GREMIO

    They're busy within; you were best knock louder.

    Pedant looks out of the window

Pedant

    What's he that knocks as he would beat down the gate?

VINCENTIO

    Is Signior Lucentio within, sir?

Pedant

    He's within, sir, but not to be spoken withal.

VINCENTIO

    What if a man bring him a hundred pound or two, to
    make merry withal?

Pedant

    Keep your hundred pounds to yourself: he shall
    need none, so long as I live.

PETRUCHIO

    Nay, I told you your son was well beloved in Padua.
    Do you hear, sir? To leave frivolous circumstances,
    I pray you, tell Signior Lucentio that his father is
    come from Pisa, and is here at the door to speak with him.

Pedant

    Thou liest: his father is come from Padua and here
    looking out at the window.

VINCENTIO

    Art thou his father?

Pedant

    Ay, sir; so his mother says, if I may believe her.

PETRUCHIO

    [To VINCENTIO] Why, how now, gentleman! why, this
    is flat knavery, to take upon you another man's name.

Pedant

    Lay hands on the villain: I believe a' means to
    cozen somebody in this city under my countenance.

    Re-enter BIONDELLO

BIONDELLO

    I have seen them in the church together: God send
    'em good shipping! But who is here? mine old
    master Vincentio! now we are undone and brought to nothing.

VINCENTIO

    [Seeing BIONDELLO]
    Come hither, crack-hemp.

BIONDELLO

    Hope I may choose, sir.

VINCENTIO

    Come hither, you rogue. What, have you forgot me?

BIONDELLO

    Forgot you! no, sir: I could not forget you, for I
    never saw you before in all my life.

VINCENTIO

    What, you notorious villain, didst thou never see
    thy master's father, Vincentio?

BIONDELLO

    What, my old worshipful old master? yes, marry, sir:
    see where he looks out of the window.

VINCENTIO

    Is't so, indeed.

    Beats BIONDELLO

BIONDELLO

    Help, help, help! here's a madman will murder me.

    Exit

Pedant

    Help, son! help, Signior Baptista!

    Exit from above

PETRUCHIO

    Prithee, Kate, let's stand aside and see the end of
    this controversy.

    They retire

    Re-enter Pedant below; TRANIO, BAPTISTA, and Servants

TRANIO

    Sir, what are you that offer to beat my servant?

VINCENTIO

    What am I, sir! nay, what are you, sir? O immortal
    gods! O fine villain! A silken doublet! a velvet
    hose! a scarlet cloak! and a copatain hat! O, I
    am undone! I am undone! while I play the good
    husband at home, my son and my servant spend all at
    the university.

TRANIO

    How now! what's the matter?

BAPTISTA

    What, is the man lunatic?

TRANIO

    Sir, you seem a sober ancient gentleman by your
    habit, but your words show you a madman. Why, sir,
    what 'cerns it you if I wear pearl and gold? I
    thank my good father, I am able to maintain it.

VINCENTIO

    Thy father! O villain! he is a sailmaker in Bergamo.

BAPTISTA

    You mistake, sir, you mistake, sir. Pray, what do
    you think is his name?

VINCENTIO

    His name! as if I knew not his name: I have brought
    him up ever since he was three years old, and his
    name is Tranio.

Pedant

    Away, away, mad ass! his name is Lucentio and he is
    mine only son, and heir to the lands of me, Signior Vincentio.

VINCENTIO

    Lucentio! O, he hath murdered his master! Lay hold
    on him, I charge you, in the duke's name. O, my
    son, my son! Tell me, thou villain, where is my son Lucentio?

TRANIO

    Call forth an officer.

    Enter one with an Officer
    Carry this mad knave to the gaol. Father Baptista,
    I charge you see that he be forthcoming.

VINCENTIO

    Carry me to the gaol!

GREMIO

    Stay, officer: he shall not go to prison.

BAPTISTA

    Talk not, Signior Gremio: I say he shall go to prison.

GREMIO

    Take heed, Signior Baptista, lest you be
    cony-catched in this business: I dare swear this
    is the right Vincentio.

Pedant

    Swear, if thou darest.

GREMIO

    Nay, I dare not swear it.

TRANIO

    Then thou wert best say that I am not Lucentio.

GREMIO

    Yes, I know thee to be Signior Lucentio.

BAPTISTA

    Away with the dotard! to the gaol with him!

VINCENTIO

    Thus strangers may be hailed and abused: O
    monstrous villain!

    Re-enter BIONDELLO, with LUCENTIO and BIANCA

BIONDELLO

    O! we are spoiled and--yonder he is: deny him,
    forswear him, or else we are all undone.

LUCENTIO

    [Kneeling] Pardon, sweet father.

VINCENTIO

    Lives my sweet son?

    Exeunt BIONDELLO, TRANIO, and Pedant, as fast as may be

BIANCA

    Pardon, dear father.

BAPTISTA

    How hast thou offended?
    Where is Lucentio?

LUCENTIO

    Here's Lucentio,
    Right son to the right Vincentio;
    That have by marriage made thy daughter mine,
    While counterfeit supposes bleared thine eyne.

GREMIO

    Here's packing, with a witness to deceive us all!

VINCENTIO

    Where is that damned villain Tranio,
    That faced and braved me in this matter so?

BAPTISTA

    Why, tell me, is not this my Cambio?

BIANCA

    Cambio is changed into Lucentio.

LUCENTIO

    Love wrought these miracles. Bianca's love
    Made me exchange my state with Tranio,
    While he did bear my countenance in the town;
    And happily I have arrived at the last
    Unto the wished haven of my bliss.
    What Tranio did, myself enforced him to;
    Then pardon him, sweet father, for my sake.

VINCENTIO

    I'll slit the villain's nose, that would have sent
    me to the gaol.

BAPTISTA

    But do you hear, sir? have you married my daughter
    without asking my good will?

VINCENTIO

    Fear not, Baptista; we will content you, go to: but
    I will in, to be revenged for this villany.

    Exit

BAPTISTA

    And I, to sound the depth of this knavery.

    Exit

LUCENTIO

    Look not pale, Bianca; thy father will not frown.

    Exeunt LUCENTIO and BIANCA

GREMIO

    My cake is dough; but I'll in among the rest,
    Out of hope of all, but my share of the feast.

    Exit

KATHARINA

    Husband, let's follow, to see the end of this ado.

PETRUCHIO

    First kiss me, Kate, and we will.

KATHARINA

    What, in the midst of the street?

PETRUCHIO

    What, art thou ashamed of me?

KATHARINA

    No, sir, God forbid; but ashamed to kiss.

PETRUCHIO

    Why, then let's home again. Come, sirrah, let's away.

KATHARINA

    Nay, I will give thee a kiss: now pray thee, love, stay.

PETRUCHIO

    Is not this well? Come, my sweet Kate:
    Better once than never, for never too late.

    Exeunt

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